One of my greatest challenges has honestly been opening myself fully to others.
Beside my lover. Even then things arise.
It comes with its own unique quests & encounters like a burning inferno for authentic purification.
That is why he said it so good, "relationships are the greatest Sadhana." And that is the greatest power that Love can provide.
Pure love reveals AUTHENTICITY.
One's Authentic Self.
That is the only way one can truly relate to any "other" one or thing (I think we got the message that we're all One by now), which is why coming HOME into authenticity can be so invigorating
beautiful. IN other words, 'Who AM I?" The most dominant question since I was 5 years old.
Maybe exposing my authenticity is challenging because somewhere inside of me my warrior will take things as a challenge, rather than a blessing OR a curse.
Or the creatrix inside of me waving her magic wand, riding a dolphin saying "Just make it up, make it all up."
Or perhaps it's the double-edge sword of genius that knows it knows too much and nothing at the same time to express anything that will make sense in a non-sensical, evolving library of consciousness; sheltered in Truth and stacked with holy lies.
Maybe the yogini vibe within me sees all of it as God(dess) and thus it's all good & so there is nowhere to go and nothing to do, indefinitely.
Or perhaps the rebel inside of me is ferociously resourcing another way to go about it all. "Outrageous, go with outrageous."
And the one who hid inside of me, way, way long ago, she is still there. Her light grew dim from funny statements like, "nobody can understand you" & "you're overqualified" & "you're too bright, try dimming it down a little."
The cosmic joker within now laughing. She giggles while the hider continues to play, knowing she has already been found.
Then again, the scientist within me keeps making maps out of soul-body & mind that can reveal some kind of method to my creative madness enough to unleash this authentic artist within.
To her, all these words mean nothing, so she throws all of it to the walls like smashing ceramics to the floors, taking refuge in emptiness, charcoal and ink.
All so the writer within contests, conjuring up squiggles in space that reinforce the value of rearranging words into meaningful prose.
And the philosopher says, "Well is what you are saying true?"
And the buddhist within says, "Is it necessary?"
And the jew within says, "Is it miraculous?"
And the Taoist within says, "If it can be put into words, then it is not the Truth."
She draws powerfully from these guides & all the others within; Nature-Lover, Alien, Alchemist, Comedian, Hermit, Runner, Dreamer, Activator, Individual, Rainbow, Seedling, Hummingbird and all the thousands of cosmic aspects that are inherent in everyone, if only by a hologram.
Meanwhile, the harpist part of me begins playing a melody, "You got it all wrong, it's here, here is the answer to all ponderings in Life!"
So profoundly, silence wakes up in momentous love whispering to me, "it's not so silent in here, come enjoy the bliss that hides in plain sight between this, that, and "the other." Only share this.
All while this bij mantra has not stopped playing in my mind since Eternity.
Along with my Yogi advisors feeding me the language of soma from the other side.
And somewhere that is really now-here, after that giant Tea party we just entertained....somewhere deep in Her quietness, all is revealed...
As long as what you do, say, think, within a relationship is done with Heart, there an be no room for err.